New Mommy 411

Behavior: 1,2,3 Magic

2011-12-06T09:54:00.000-08:00

I am not sure if I have mentioned this book before, but I was a teacher before I had children and had not problems controlling my class. My son stumped me as far a behavior. My daughter is doing the same thing now. I started this books method with my son at around 15months and my daughter is 23months and I have been doing it again. I have found it to work very well for us.

My daughter has recently started saying NO to everything that I ask and taking her clothes off after I dress her. I use the 1,2,3 method and she knows I mean business. My son used to do dangerous things, like climb onto tables and jump off the couch arms. It worked for that as well.

1,2,3 Magic by Dr. Thomas Phelan

http://www.parentmagic.com/

Interview with Mark Cuban about his new book, "How To Win At The Sport Of Business"

2011-12-05T09:46:00.000-08:00

I recently interviewed Mark Cuban about his new book. For those of you who don't know Mark Cuban, he is a self made billionaire. He is a hard working, creative, entrepreneur. He is the owner of the Dallas Mavericks, chairman of HDTV cable network HDNet, and owner of Landmark Theaters.

Many mommies who want to start a business are struggling to make ends meet
but you argue in your book, that some of the best businesses took little
to nothing to start. Why do you encourage entrepreneurs not to wait for
financing to start?

Because effort is always more important than cash.

There are many young moms who are just beginning their lives and can relate to
you when you said you were sharing a small apartment with 6 people and
sleeping on the floor. How can someone keep their eye on the prize when they’re
living on Ramen noodles?

Who cares how you are living today? I loved every minute of living in
that dump. The low rent and utilities and eating Mac n’ Cheese all
the time allowed me to afford the startup of my business. Instead of
paying myself much, I could put it in to
my business.

You knew Michael Dell of Dell Computers before he was the Michael Dell.
What can you say about being nice to people on the way up?

It's a whole lot easier to be nice to people than not to be. There are
times when you have to be tough, but a smile not only goes further,
but it makes you feel better about yourself as well.

You encourage entrepreneurs not to hire a public relations firm, Mark. How did you get the word out about your eBook?

I tweeted, posted on Facebook, [used] Google Plus and responded to emails. Nothing more.

One of my favorite parts of your book, How to Win at the Sport of Business, that completely broke my heart was when your ex-secretary robbed your first company of over $83,000, leaving you only $2000 after a year of work. If there are moms out there that have lost everything,
what advice do you have for them to pick themselves back up?

Keep working. Don’t feel sorry for yourself because it won’t do any good.

Looking back, destiny seemed to lead you from one opportunity where you
would learn a life skill to another. Do you believe in fate or luck and
how much of that has to do with hard or smart work?

There were a lot of things I didn’t write
about. So, it’s not necessarily
a direct jump from one skill to another. Starting and running a
business can be a lot of long hours. You just have to get after it and
not let up.

You were seemingly unfocused and not sure about what you want to do when
you were younger. What advice do you have to parents who are worried if their
child will ever be somebody?

No amount of
worrying is going to change things for them. They have to
figure it out for themselves. At some point, it is theirs to do or not
do.

Where can we get a copy of your eBook, How to Win at the Sport of Business?
Anywhere eBooks are sold: Amazon, BN.com, and sites that support independent bookstores too.

Twitter

2011-11-25T07:31:00.001-08:00

I just joined twitter! I have no idea how to use it but will figure it out as I go. Come see me on twitter too!

Moving from the city to the burbs

2011-11-25T05:53:00.000-08:00

My husband and I really expected to raise our children in NYC and thought we were going to live a very happy life there. We both grew up in one of NYs 5 boroughs and planned to stay in the city forever. We had, what we thought the perfect situation, 2 kids, 2 small dogs and a 3 bedroom apartment just off Central Park. We had everything we could ever want and we were in the worlds best city (as far as we were concerned).

Then our kids started to grow. Our son was 4 and in a private preschool and our daughter was on her way to joining him. As happy as we were we felt like we were always trying to keep our son still, contained, restrained, etc... Yet we continued to look for a private preK and plan for next year. We went through the whole process got into a new school and the night before we were to send in the deposit check we changed our minds. We just felt like this was not going to be the best move for our family. Especially our son. Everyday our daughter would nap for 3 hours and he would be stuck in waiting for her to wake up. He was playing like a normal child and we were shushing him so he did not wake his sister. Was this really how we wanted him (both of them) to grow up?

We put our apartment up for sale and it sold very quickly and we found a great house in a town very near NYC. We moved for the start of this school year. Our house is very nice, but we do miss the super! The neighborhood is spectacular but its not the upper west side! The neighbors are great, but you always have to say hello! Bottom line, the move has been good so far. The children, over the moon happy!!! The parents adjusting!!!

The town we moved to seems to be all transplants from the city. That gives us encouragement that we will love it here. I have been told that it is lonely for the first year while you make friends and that you really have to put yourself out there to meet people. I have been trying to join a lot of thing to meet people, but my kids keep getting sick, (maybe new school new germs). I do feel a bit lonely. However I am encouraged because I have found out that I am not the only one. And when I do miss the city, I hop in the car with the kids and visit an old hang out. I also make regular playdates with old friends in the city so some things do stay the same.

More to come on adjusting to the burbs...

Speech

2011-11-25T05:47:00.000-08:00

Just like the speech pathologist had said, my daughter started talking very well in the last few months. I am so grateful not to have to add another chore to our week by having to go to speech. But I would have gladly done it to allow my daughter to become all that she should be. I find her walking around the house most days naming things and when she doesn't know what something is, she is pointing to it saying, "This is...?" and I have to answer her. Its funny and can get a little annoying all at the same time. We feel very bless that this has all worked itself out.

Interview With Anna Deskins

2011-10-17T17:37:00.000-07:00

Me--Your children's book, The Adventures of Smitty looks magically. Tell us about it.
Anna--It's the story of a magical island of little creatures called Smilies and the mischievous little main character, Smitty. He's such a naughty boy. Haha! All the moms and kids I've shared it with have been giving me such a wonderful reaction. I cannot believe it. I have to tell you how excited I am to finally have a life-long dream come true. Writing The Adventures of Smitty was really about finding a story that I would want to read to my children at night. It has to be exciting but not scary so that my two daughters can go to sleep. Basically, I was looking for that perfect blend to read to my kids at night and decided, "Why not try writing my own?"

We've had a lot of changes in our life recently, so I want to make sure that when I put my daughters to sleep that they feel safe. I have short chapters because I know how busy we moms are but if you can just sacrifice 5 minutes at night reading to your kids, it makes a world of difference. Your kids will never forget it. And although we're running around the whirlwind of life, our kids grow up so fast, and that time that we'd rather finish watching what happened in our favorite soap opera instead of reading to our kids will never come again. I hope that The Adventures of Smitty and books like it help moms do exactly that.

Me--And it's only 99 cents this week. That's what I love about it. Now, You are recently divorced. How have you been able to continue writing when going through such a change?
Anna--Yes, it is by far one of the most challenging points in my life. To see a marriage you thought would last forever to not last forever was difficult for the two of us. I really learned a lot about myself and most importantly, it's brought me closer to my daughters. I think that's what really motivated me to finish this children's book no matter what. When you're going through changes in your life like this, you need something to hold on to. There's a part of you that wants to prove that you can make it, that you will be a success even if it's not with the partner you originally imagined building a life with. I had to keep writing, for my kids. I want to show them that they have to keep strong, no matter what.

We as women, as moms really need to stick together to support each other and our dreams. We're living in an age when I think we're finally realizing, although we want love, the men in our life aren't the answer to everything. We have to stand up on our own two feet and keep going. True love will happen, but until then, we have to keep moving forward. Our children depend on us and we depend on us.

Me--In addition to being a children's book author, you're also a small business owner. How do you juggle taking care of two daughters and at the same time running a business?
Anna--Yes, I am a fashion designer and have a retail store. Any type of creativity is what I'm passionate about. That's why writing The Adventures of Smitty was so important to me. Let me tell you, running a small business in today's economy isn't easy especially when raising two girls at the same time. But somehow, it seems someone's watching over me because my dreams are coming true no matter what. To have that many moms glowing about my children's book, means so much to me. And I know my girls are proud.

Me--When do you ever have time to write?
Anna--You mean, in between laundry, running a business, chasing my girls around the house, cleaning the house, and flying back and forth from Miami to New York? Haha? That's one thing I've learned, when you really want to do something, you find a way. Things fall into place if you just go for it and that's what I want to encourage all the moms who are reading this right now. Whatever your goal is, you can do it. Don't let the challenges in your personal life stop you from going for your dreams. Just go for it and it's almost magical how things fall into place.

Me--Where can we get a copy of "The Adventures of Smitty"?
Anna--Right now, it's available online by going to: http://www.smashwords.com/books/view/94655 You can also visit my website: http://www.AnnaDeskins.com where you can read more about my writing process, my recommendations for other books and my own adventures in Mommyhood.

I'm so grateful for your support and the support I'm getting from so many wonderful moms who dream of writing children's books one day too. Writing The Adventures of Smitty has been such an emotional experience for me, a true journey as I was going through so many changes while writing it. It's truly been a blessing in my life. It, along with my daughters, and that guy upstairs have really pulled me through a challenging time.

Me--Thanks for the interview, Anna. And let's go out and support a fellow mom by getting a copy of The Adventures of Smitty today. I know I will!

Newborn Waking To Feeding

2011-08-18T19:18:00.000-07:00

A good friend of mine had a baby a few days ago. She asked me how to wake her new born up to feed her. I immeadiately thought of the friends episode wham Rachel woke her baby and she screamed for hours!
But in real life and you have a new born, you sometimes do have to wake them.

I was told from my mom, who is a pediatric nurse, to wake the baby during the day and not at night for feeding. She always said the baby would wake at night if it was hungry. My kids were always a healthy regular weight and always ate fairly well.

Another friend of mine had very small children and she was told to wake them for the first few months at night.

So ask your doctor what they recommend.

But as far as how to wake them, I was always successful feeding by: unswaddling the baby, tickling their feet a little, taking them out of their nice little comfort zone. That made my children a bit more awake and they would eat.

I Am Not A Doctor

2011-08-18T18:39:00.000-07:00

I basically received a hate mail letter tonight from a doctor who, I feel, clearly did not read my posts or personal description correctly. I am not a doctor! I have never said I was an expert! I am offering my opinion based on my own personal experiences as a parent, things I here from other parents and advices I have been given from my children's doctors. I do recall having said in verbal posts, "Ask the expert!". That's not me!

I started my blog as a reference for myself to document what I am learning and what I have learned. Some people have seemed to enjoy reading it and find some of my experiences helpful. All people are different. Different things work for them. And if even 1 person finds 1 bit of advice that I have offered based on my life helpful, then I consider my posting a blog instead of just keeping a journal a success.

So if you don't like me, that's fine.
If you think my advice based on the things that I have done stinks, so be it!

Waking At Night, around 20 Months

2011-08-14T18:30:00.000-07:00

Both my kids did this and it took weeks to fix! This is when I started the clock that turns green with my son and I just ordered it for my daughter. My daughter just started waking up at 4am every night and telling me that she is, "Done!". She wants to get up for the day and I a, not having it. She goes to bed about 7:30 pm and thatbis not enough sleep for her, I can see she is still tired when I go in to her and she needs to sleep. She is so strong willed and stubborn that she will stay up for at least and hour yelling all done and the she falls beck to sleep untilm7:30-8am. I end umpired and annoyed!
If your baby does this, I think, based on my own experiences and the experiences of my friends, you need to just stay strong. Come up with a plan that works for you ( Ferber etc...) and stick with it. My life is stinking right now because my daughter is in the mist of this. I am spending my days pointing out everything that's green and yellow so that when the clock shows up she will get it. My son did. I pray that it works for her.

Kids change all the time and decide that they want to take control over certain situations. We as parents have to show them that we are boss and that they have to listen to our rules. Now it is sleeping when you are supposed to sleep, later it will be borrowing the car or abiding by a curfuw. It stinks! But don't give in and get up, you will have problems even longer. Don't give in and bring them in your bed, you will be creating an issue that will last even longer.

Best of luck, what doesn kill you will only make you stronger.

Speech After Ear Issues (Tubes/Fluid)

2011-08-14T18:10:00.000-07:00

My daughter has had tubes since December of 2010. She had both ears 100% filled with fluid from the end of October 2010-December 28, 2010. When she had the fluid in her ears she was hearing very little, if at all. She gained no language skills when her ears had the fluid in them, and my pediatrician has said that she does not recomend going with fluid in the ear longer then 3 months because language development is so high at this time. My daughter got tubes on December 28, 2010 and within 2 weeks had 10 new words. The only issue that I had was many of her words that she used often, she was leaving the endings off of. And she still does this. For example, she says "mil" instead of "milk.". I finally had her evaluated for speach in May, (she was about 17 months) and the speech pathologist told me that was normal. She should continue to gain words at a rapid pace and that if I was still concerned to have her looked at in the fall at about 22 months and that would look at her progress. She has continued to learn new words but she still does not finish the same words that she did not finish before. She does not speak in sentences but in 2 word phrases. My son was speaking so well and she seems a world away.

Long story short, they are 2 different kids. I was concerned and had it check out. What's going on is not like I experienced before, but it is of a different normal and I am going to have to get used to it.

When you (the parent) are unsure about what you are seeing. Get it checked by the expert and listen to their advice. You are the best advocate for your baby and you are the only one that can help them succeed in life at this point. Just do it!

More About Tubes

2011-08-14T18:03:00.001-07:00

I took my daughter to the ENT for a 6 month check up after her tubes. The doctor told me that her tubes were still in and looked fine. I was excited to here this. Then the doctor told me that I needed to come back in a few months for another check up, that the tubes should have fallen out by then. I was shocked to here this! He proceeded to tell me that tubes generally only last about 9 months at the longest. This was shocking news to me since I just automatically thought that we would get at lest another winter out of this set of tubes, since they were still in. Now I am quite stressed about that fact that we are heading into this winter, chances are, with no tubes. And to top it off we just got to the beach and she has another ear infection, her third since the tubes were put in.

Strep in a Baby

2011-07-18T10:43:00.000-07:00

Babies can get step as young as 16 months old. Especially if they have an older sibling. Often parents mistake the symptoms for things like coxsackies virus.
My daughter got strep at 17 months. I thought it was teething because she had a low grade temp of 100 for three days. She was very irritable but again she is like that when teething as well. I was so surprised by this. My daughter was also up a lot at night from her throat hurting. I even thought maybe it was her ears.

Book Review- "Carla and Leo's World of Dance"

2011-07-18T10:21:00.000-07:00

I have never done a book review before, but recently, I was emailed and asked if I could review Carla and Leo's World of Dance, by Agatha Relota. This book is educational and motivating all at the same time. At first I felt that the book was written for children about the age of 10 or older. But then my four and a half year old asked if I would read him the book. Agatha Relota has a way of telling facts about each location of the world that is both interesting to an adult and simple enough for my young son to understand. And then she explains how to do the different dances that go along with each area of the world, like the Tango is from Argentine. My four year old was so interested in this book that he made me try each dance with him and look up each country on a world map. Very appropriate for a ten year old, when read in stages also excellent for a child as young as four. I rate this book 4 stars!!!

Tubes

2011-05-05T15:02:00.000-07:00

So now your child has tubes. What does that mean...
Basically, the ENT is making a small hole in your child ear drum and then inserting a very small plastic tube that will allow fluid and mucus to drain out of the ear and into the nose. Now your child will not have the pressure in their ear, even if they have an infection and they will not have the hearing loss from the fluid build up.

The ENT told me that I would see discharge if my daughter had an ear infection again after that. I went running to the doctor when her sheets were wet, probably from sweat p, because I was not sure what it would look like.

Well let me just tell you it s usually 150% obvious when your child has drainage from an ear infection after tubes. A lot of children don't even get infections after tubes. Some do! When they do, you can just look in the ear with your eyes and see dry crusted stuff in the ear. Sometimes after a nap it can even look like wet liquid snot. Once my daughters ear was such a cesspool of snot that 10 q tips didn't do it justice. So when I used drops nothing happened because they were just sitting on a bed if mucus. I had to take her to the ENT to have her ear suctioned then we could use the drops. Imagine if she didn't have those tubes! She didn't even cry at night when she had this infection.

Another time she had a bad cold and when the doctor looked in her ear, it looked like one if the tubes had fallen out. The tubes can fall out as early as three months but usually last a few years. The tube had not fallen out it was actually clogged with dry mucus. Again we had to go to the ENT and he used drops to liquify the mucus and suction her ear. Again she was not waking in pain.

They tell you that it is ok to swim with tubes. And it is! But just be aware that when the ear gets water in it through the tubes at certain angles, for some children, it can cause a moment of pain. Just watch your child and assess your own situation. Mt daughter takes swimming lessons every week and she is fine with it so far.

More on Ear Infections & Tubes

2011-05-05T14:30:00.000-07:00

Apparently when children get a bad ear infection their ear is filled with mucus and fluid. Often the antibiotic gets rid of the mucus and any other yuck stuff in the ear but does not dry all the fluid. It can take up to 3 moths for all this fluid to drain and leaves your child more susceptible to additional ear infections.
Fun times!
While your child's ear is filled with fluid (either 100% or parochially) they have some hearing loss and are pretty much hearing like they are underwater. When a chid is very small and has this fluid for 3 months they can often end up with a speech delay. Imagine you not hearing for 3 months.
Sometimes an ENT will elect to put tubes in you child's ears if the fluid never drains. Sometimes they will not. My children's pediatrician likes to have a child get tubes if they still have fluid after 3 moths because that is usually a sign that the fluid will never drain and she does not see a reason in having the child suffer. The fluid can cause pain and again can cause a speech delay that can be avoided.

My daughter had 100% fluid filled ears and ended up getting 8 ear infections in 10 weeks. We did tubes at week 11. It was the best thing ever!

Ear Infections

2011-05-05T14:00:00.000-07:00

Well my life had been taken over by ear infections in the fall and moved in to bronchiolitis in the winter/spring. Lucky me!

Let's start with ear infections first. And start simply.

Apparently we all have tubes in our ears that run from the ear to the nose. As we grow our heads grow and the tubes tilt. Babies tubes are usually quite flat. When we blow our nose, the mucus comes out these tubes into a tissue. Babies cant blow, and we usually use something to suck the mucus out. But we can't do this as often as we would blow our nose. So often times children that have the tubes with very little tilt, end up with an ear infection.
You can tell your child has an ear infection because they usually are good in the day when they are upright, then after just a few hours of sleep are up most of the night because of pressure build up in their ears from laying down. It feels like they have been on a plane and their ears will not pop. Usually the child gets a fever along with the earache. Often they will pull on their ears. They can get an infection in 1 ear or both. You cannot see it on your own and usually need antibiotic to get rid of it.

Some ways to help relieve the pain for your baby is drinking a bottle or sippy cup. The sucking helps the child to swallow and makes them feel better. A pacifier actually is not good for this. I ended up giving my daughter her cup in bed with water when she was really bad and it would help her go back to sleep. There are also homeopathic drops you can try. Some people love them but I did not have much luck. Also you can try tilting the crib mattress so the head is not so flat. I put towels under the mattress. This was helpful when my daughter was sleeping in the right direction. But we all know babies move around a lot.

My very trusted pediatric ENT said pacifiers, smoking and drinking bottles in bed can all add to causes of ear infections.

Update

2011-02-13T19:11:00.000-08:00

I am so sorry that I have not posted in months. My daughter basically has caught every illness that my son has brought home from school. Long story short, she had 8 ear infections between October and December, we did tubes the end of December. Then she has had one stomach bug or cold after another.
I will get back into this very soon. I learned a lot and have a lot to share.
I hope everyone is well.

Exersaucer VS. Jump-A-Roo

2010-10-02T16:59:00.000-07:00

The Baby Einstein Exersaucer VS The Rainforest Jump-A-Roo

I have both and like them both. However, I have started both of my kids with them between the ages of 5 months and 6 months. They both seem equal at this point in time. Both do an equal job.

Once the baby learns to jump, the Jump-A-Roo seems to be a favorite of parents because it tires the baby out.

Now that my daughter is 9 months old, she will still go in the Jump-A-Roo but will not let me put her down in the Exersaucer. I think because she can't move around except for the circle. Many of my friends tell me the same thing.

So If you have to pick one, (because they are both pretty large), I would go for the Jump-A-Roo!

I have the brands above and am pretty happy with my picks. I tend to like the full jumpers and not the ones that go in the doorway because they have toys. There are a lot of brands and they are all similar.

My Award!

2010-09-28T18:25:00.001-07:00

I never really win anything but turned on my computer yesterday and discovered that another lovely blogger gave me an award. I have to send this award to others in the future (so I really have to spend a bit more time blogging and reading).

Thank you so much!

I feel like I write this just to keep these ideas fresh but it is exciting that I may actually be helping someone.

I received the award from

http://myadventures-in-mommyland.blogspot.com

I could not find her button to paste it on my site. So check her out!

Beaba Baby Cook

2010-09-28T18:15:00.000-07:00

This is the best thing ever. I made fun of everyone that had it because I thought I had no time to actually make baby food. This machine takes less time then actually cooking! It has actually come in more handy for my toddler because he does not want to eat his veggies. I can steam just about anything and mash it into his pasta and he is eating it.

My baby is the worst eater I have ever encountered. I literally just throw whatever we are eating into this machine and steam it for her. Then I chop it into little pieces. You could bled it and the food comes out great but my daughter will not eat any blended food.

You should buy this if you have kids!

Thumb Sucking

2010-09-02T12:35:00.000-07:00

A mom recently asked me if I had any advice on thumb sucking. I did not have much to offer her, so I decided to do a little research on this topic. I came up with a few OK articles and 1 product based on many reviews, that looks like it works.

(You can buy all of these on amazon.com)
Mavala Stop- this looks like it may actually work

Thum liquid- the reviews don't look that great

Thumbusters- your child has to wear this and I know mine would never. So I don't see this being a very good product.

A good book to read to your child is "the Berenstain Bears & the Bad Habit" by Stan & Jan Berenstain

Good luck to those of you that want/need to stop this behavior.

Sunblock

2010-09-01T12:11:00.001-07:00

All babies can use some type of sunblock. Even with sunblock I would still not put a really young child in direct sun for a long time.

New babies under 6 mons of age can use clinque sunblock that you buy in a department store. It is one of the few gentle enough.
Babies over 6 mons can use any baby sunblock that is for babies. Make sure it says tear free!

I found blue lizard to work the best for my toddler, even in the islands during the winter. He didn't even get pink cheeks, in the direct sun all day.
I also love the neutrogena spray sunblock for my toddler and the California baby sunblock stick for his face.

For my baby I used clinique this summer and sometimes babyblanket. I like the clinique stick on her face and I also used the California baby stick on her as well.

Diaper Rash

2010-09-01T11:53:00.000-07:00

So for the last month my family has all taken a turn having an awful cold. Each one of use has needed antibiotics for it. It sucked!

Along with the cold my daughter had had a small diaper rash. She had this from teething I think. I learned that when you already have a diaper rash from teething and you go on antibiotics, this usually makes the rash about 100 times worse. Almost like a woman's yeast infection. The original rash had small circular dots, which is usually a yeast type of rash because teething changes the ph in urine. You can use lotrimin (the athletes foot cream) for this.
After the meds my daughter needed a prescription diaper cream that did not work, and then a burn cream called silver nitrate to clear the rash and it still took a week.

The moral of the story....if your child gets a diaper rash that has spots seek lotrimin, if it doesn't clear up in a few days, see a doctor.

Burping

2010-08-13T12:19:00.001-07:00

I have always burped my kids by tapping their backs like any other typical mom. My son burped so easily and when my daughter came along she did burp but it took a bit longer.
One day my mother fed my daughter as we were talking and then went to burp her. She hadn't burped after 5 minutes so my mom (without saying anything) just started rubbing my daughters back. She did this by holding her like she would if she were going to burp her normally (over the shoulder), then she firm but gently ribbed my daughters back up and down. She burped in less then a minute!
I had never thought of burping this way before. Apparently it works very well for my daughter and she always burps very quickly this way.
I felt like a light bulb went on and that I needed to share this as soon as possible.
I hope it helps someone whose baby is a tough to burp also.

Pacifier

2010-08-03T12:13:00.000-07:00

Most babies use them and they are so hard to give up!
I recently has my daughter give up her pacifier (at 7 months) She did pretty well. I took them all away on a Saturday morning because she woke up every hour of Friday night looking for one. That is crazy! No sane person can live like that. More importantly, it is now one less thing for me to remember before we leave the house. She only had a meltdown for her first nap without it. She cried for an hour. The second nap she cried for 5 minutes. And, that was it.

For my son, we got rid of them at 11 months. We used to put ten in his bed and he would always find one. There was even a time when he would fall asleep with 2 in each hand and and 1 in his mouth. Awful! One day we went to the pediatrician ( who thought I should have gotten rid of them around 4 months), and she mentioned me still allowing him to use one. She also mentioned the longer I waited to get rid of it the harder time I was going to have. So that day at nap instead of handing him a pacifier I handed him a lovie, swiped the pacifiers and walk out of the room. He fell asleep just fine for 2 days. Then on the 3rd day at 3am he had a 1 hour and 30 minute meltdown, then it was all over.
He is 3 1/2 and still sleeps with the lovie! I don't care if he wants to take it to college with him. Lol

Water

2010-08-03T12:05:00.000-07:00

You can start giving your baby water at 6 mons. At first you are going to think it's a joke. You will give them a sippy of water with each meal. Try not to put the water in a bottle. At 6 mons the baby should be trying and I stress trying (my daughter still will not do this) to eat 3 meals a day. Offer a sippy of water with each meal. Hold it up to their mouth and usually they will chew on the spout. At some point between 6-8mons, they will actually drink water from the cup.
This is a really good lead into cups and breaking your child off a bottle. I throw out all bottles the day my child turns 1.

Feeding Tip

2010-07-22T18:47:00.000-07:00

If you breast feed...To get your baby to sleep a bit longer, top them off with a bottle after they have fallen asleep from breast feeding. You can use pumped milk or formula. Sometimes you can get the baby to take an extra ounce or two and that could help the baby push from 4 hours to 6 hours of sleep. Only do this at the bedtime feed!

Some people suggest doing a feed just before you go to bed. It is often called, "A Dream Feed." This works well the first few weeks, however if you do this after the first few weeks the baby begins to use it as a regular feed and depends on it to eat instead of pushing them to last longer. Also, as the baby gets bigger if you wake it up, it may try to stay awake.

I tried very hard to only breast feed and use no formula. It was a task I put onto myself, and made myself feel guilty for even thinking about formula before 6 mons. That was very silly! With my son, it didn't matter what I fed him-he ate. So switching from breast milk to formula was fine. For my daughter, it was so traumatic-she went on a hunger strike for a whole day. After this experience with my daughter, if I were to have another baby and did not want to use formula for a whole feed; I would try to do the topping of at night with formula. This way the baby would be used to the taste.

Every baby is so different, you need to find what works for you.

Newborn, Day & Night Confusion

2010-07-22T10:12:00.000-07:00

Many newborns mix up day and night sleep. You can avoid this for the most part but not always altogether. Here are some simple tips: Wake babies (very new ones) in the day to eat.
Never wake them at night!!!!
Do try and play with them, talk to them and be noisy around them in the day.
Have the baby nap during the day in a place other then the night time bed until day and night is 100% established.
Do wake the baby to go out and live life during the day.

Establish a night routine with your baby as soon as possible. A good pattern is to bath baby, dress baby for night with low lights, feed baby in bedroom (maybe sing to baby), burp baby and put in crib asleep or even if baby is still awake! It is never too early for them to learn to put themselves to sleep.
Infants between the age of 0-4 mons generally look to go to bed between 8-10 pm, infants 4 mons and older look to go to bed between 6-8pm, this is their body clock! If you want a nice life don't mess with it until they are older, just so they are awake when your husband gets home from work!
When an infant wakes at night, smell them ( if they did not poop -don't change them!).
DO NOT TALK TO THEM!!!!!!! Try to not even make eye contact.
Do not put the TV on!
Do not take them out of the room that they are to be sleeping in!
Turn on as little light as possible. A nightlight is best!
Feed the baby, burp the baby and put them back in their bed.
If they cry, pick them up and smell them, burp them and put the baby back in bed.
Do not play with the baby!

If the days and nights are badly mixed this could take up to 2 weeks to fix. Otherwise a few days should do the trick.

Always use your mothers intuition! You know your baby best.

Illness

2010-07-20T17:50:00.001-07:00

My family just survived our first full blown family illness. This was not fun and very difficult. We all took our turn having a virus. This made me think about the fact that there are a bunch of things that I did not know the first time my son was sick.
FIRST and foremost go out and buy a container of clear pedialyte!!!!!!!!! You always end up needing it in the middle of the night. While your at it make sure you have a good thermometer, Tylenol (or store brand), Motrin (or store brand-if your baby is 6mons or older), a cool mist humidifier, saline nose drops, nasal aspirator and vicks vapor rib

If your baby has a fever-105 or more call your doctor ASAP
Give the baby a dose of tylenol or mortin. Give the baby a warm bath and gradually add cool water. This will help the fever to come down gradually. A cold bath could shock the baby. If the fever does not come down with the 1st dose of meds, you can give both tylenol and motrin but 2 hours apart. My son needed this. His fevers were always so high they needed every trick in the book to come down.

If they throw up-1 time just watch the babies behavior. If they do this 2 times, wait 30 minutes and you can give the baby 1-2 ounces of pedialyte, continue this for several hours so that the baby stays hydrated. After several hours you can most likely give the baby a bigger bottle of pedialyte. Wait 12 hours before giving the baby a milk product again. Do not give the baby food! Although my daughter did enjoy chewing on a teething biscuit at meal times.

If they have diareah-do not give the baby a milk/formula bottle, switch to pedialyte. You can give the baby simple food. Many people say feed them the BRAT diet. B-bananas, R-rice, A-applesauce, T-toast This helps to bind the baby.

If the baby cannot keep anything in for 4-6 hours, you need to call your doctor. The most important thing is that the baby not get dehydrated. You want to avoid a trip to the emergency room!

If the baby is coughing-there is no cough meds to give kids anymore. You can steam them in the bathroom. You turn the shower on hot, put a towel under the door and stay in the bathroom until the water starts dripping down from the ceiling like rain. Usually about 20 minutes! This will moisten the lungs and helps the baby breath and not cough as much. IT SUCKS! YOU GET SOAKED AND YOU ARE COLD WHEN YOU COME OUT OF THE BATHROOM! Make sure the baby is stripped into their diaper before you do this and wrap them in a towel before you come out so that they stay warm. It really works if you do it correctly. Also, make sure that you use a cool mist humidifier and vicks vapor rub is good too when you put them to sleep.

If their nose if congested-lay the baby down on its back, squirt the saline into their nose. Wait about a minute or 2 and you can use the nasal aspirator. Usually you will get a little bit out this way. If you can see stuff in their nose and you cannot get it with the aspirator, you can gently use a Q-tip around the outer edge. That usually gets it out.

GOOD LUCK!

Weight After Baby

2010-07-12T18:55:00.000-07:00

Many people say it takes nine months to gain it and it takes nine months to loose it! It took me a year to loose it all with my son. It sucked! I did everything and then some to get all the weight off.

When I was pregnant with my daughter I ate better, gained less but 6 months postpartum, I still have 12lbs to go.

I breast fed both of my children for 6 months and people always say when you breast feed the weight melts off.

I am living proof and so are about 10 other moms that I have recently spoken to, the last 10-15lbs do not come off (typically) until after you are done breast feeding. We are pretty sure it is hormones. It is also very hard to cut calories to what you really need to, to get that last bit off.

Breast feed your babies as long as you wish, but just understand that you cannot expect to reclaim your former weight and your former body, until you are done 100%. I have tried it and failed. Be proud to breast feed your children if you choose to and it works for you and baby. Do not knock those that don't! And, don't be hard on yourself to look perfect too quickly. When your all done feeding your baby, you can focus on the rest. You are doing a selfless act!

Waking at Night After 4 Months

2010-07-10T14:18:00.000-07:00

You can sleep train your baby at about 4 months of age. Typically when your baby is double their birth weight or some variation. Some people say they need to weigh 12lbs, others say 14lbs. No matter what you read, check with your doctor first. Often this topic comes up at about 4 months.

These are 2 methods and books that I have used. There is no magic answer and all babies are different. They will wake again if something is bothering them! You should be in tune with your baby and their needs. Don't just ignore them and let them cry all the time after they have been sleep trained. Set your own standards and always give into your mother's intuition!

For my son the Ferber method worked really well. I could not imagine that this method would not work for everyone because it came so easy for him. Many people refer to this method as the, "Cry it out!" method. It is and it isn't! This method is letting the baby cry with a plan. You have to be strong and it works really well. My son is 3 and a half, he still sleeps 11 hours a night and naps 2 hours a day.

When I had my daughter, Ferber did not work at all! I used the Weissbluth method. And some Ferber ideas. Weissbluth has a lot to say about post colic children. When I read the chapters on colic, it was as if the chapters were written about my child-specifically.

I suggest that you read both books and take what you can handle to sleep train your baby. You will find it hard at first but be so grateful in the end. My children sleep 10-12 hours a night. They nap every day too! They are always well rested and happy! (Not always perfectly behaved!) My husband calls me the sleep notzie! But a well rested baby makes a happy (well rested) mom.

Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child

by: Marc Weissbluth, M.D.

Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems

by: Richard Ferber, M.D.

Toddler Behavior

2010-07-10T14:00:00.000-07:00

I was a teacher for young children, I did my undergraduate thesis on behavior and transitions, my masters is in children psychology, I could not control my son at 15 months. One day I found him standing on the dining room table swatting at the crystal chandelier.

What is a mom to do???

I reached out at this point to all of my new mom friends and learned a few tips. But the best advice I received was to bye and read the book 1,2,3 Magic by Thomas W. Phelan. I have used this book in its form or my own modified form for the last 2 and a half years.

At first my son would not sit for the time outs. So I sat with him on my lap and crossed my arms over his for 1 minute. Eventually he sat for his timeouts. Now he sits in a rocker in his bedroom with an egg timer that he turns off when it beeps.

This has saved my sanity!

Constipation for Babies

2010-07-10T13:28:00.000-07:00

Both of my children have had issues with constipation as infants. My son's issues came as he switched from breast milk to formula and my daughter seems to have been born constipated.

My son's issues seemed to be of the more typical kind, he just wasn't going. We tried prune juice and that seemed to work most of the time. The rare occasion that the prune juice did not work we would try a glycerin suppository.

My daughter's issues have been entirely different on the other hand. My daughter was solely breastfed and became constipated. She would go to the bathroom fine for the first half of the day, then she seemed to not go the second half of the day. She would have smelly gas and act like she was trying to push and nothing was coming out. She would not eat, she cried a lot and then when she went it would be like an explosion. Most breastfed kids poop after each feed, especially when they are really small. (I am not sure of the amount for formula fed kids).

The first thing I did was adjust my diet. I tried to drink a lot more water and eat as healthy as possible.
Then we tried: A tea spoon of dark brown sugar and 2 ounces of warn water-that did not work for her.
Next we tried prune juice at 6 weeks of age, 1oz, one time a day. That worked for a short time. Then we added it two times a day, that seemed to work for a while and as she got bigger we increased the amount to 2 ounces twice a day.
On occasion I would still have to give her a suppository.
At 6 months I have had to put her in miralax, this seems to be working at the moment.

She seems to be doing well. I am hoping she grows out of this soon. I guess as far as issues a baby can have, this seems to be no big deal. However when you are living it, these issues are all consuming with a baby that cannot talk. It keeps them and you up at night!

Swaddle or Not to Swaddle

2010-07-06T19:42:00.000-07:00

There is no set amount of time to swaddle your baby. Usually the baby lets your know when they are done being swaddled by breaking out of it during the night.

The best swaddle blanket, that holds the tightest and lasts the longest is the Kiddopotamus SwaddleMe. It is better then just using a blanket and stronger then the miracle blanket.

I found out the second time around the reason for swaddleing-they should tell you this before you leave the hospital...

Besides the obvious reasons, making the baby feel safe and warm, like it is still inside.

Swaddleing keeps the babies hands down and controlled. Babies do not have all their reflexes in check when they are born and move while sleeping. Babies tend to actually hit themselves in the face and wake themselves up. When swaddled, they sleep better and longer.

And, don't be afraid to swaddle tightly!

Baby Items, What Do You Really Need?

2010-07-06T19:02:00.000-07:00

A good friend of mine was having a baby and she asked me what I loved and thought she really needed. I have pasted the list below because I took great care into really looking at all the items that I actually used and like.

Places to look at besides babies r us:

www.buybuybaby.com/

http://www.albeebaby.com/

http://www.diapers.com/

stroller: city mini by baby jogger (best ever for folding, comfort and everything) city select is also nice, I have that now because it can be a double too! (I have had 5 strollers!)

crib

Changing table

rocking chair or glider

baby hangers

7 a m Enfant, is the best bundle me to go over the stroller because it is good from infant-toddler. All the other ones you have to buy in every size.

Car seat- I have the graco safe seat (infant car seat) and its fine, not too sure of the other ones out there. I also have the (toddler seat) britax marathon, I like that too!

To cover car seat in winter, the best thing ever is called the kiddopotamus posh pouch or cozy up.

You definitely want the Kiddopotamus SwaddleMe, at least 3 of these. You will use it every night when you put the baby to bed.

Swing- I really love the Fisher Price Cradle Swing

Bouncer Seat- Fisher Price infant to Toddler Rocker

Monitor- movement and sound, angel care monitor

If you only have space for one thing, I would get the fisher price jumperoo, over the exersaucer.

I love the prince lionheart wipes warmer.

I like the diaper dikor trash can

Highchair- I love the svenn or the stoke, they are easier to clean and can be used for much longer.

As for pack and play, greco is fine but I actually hate them. You really don't need it unless you want the bassinet part and the changer part. I really like the Phil and Teds traveller bed, very easy to travel with, very small fold up and not heavy at all!

I also like the phil and teds lobster chair to travel with (if you get a squishy placemat you can even put it on a dining room table)

I like born free bottles and sippy cups, and avent passifyers

I would not register for any receiving blankets. I have never used one, especially in the summer. I would actually not register for any blankets bc people will buy them for you anyway.

I bought myself and love the aden and anais muslin blankets and sleep sacs all year!

Best diaper bags are the ones that wipe clean. DanteBeatrix wipes clean, fleurville and so does burberry, there are others but not a lot.

I have the bjorn with back support, it is fine. But a lot of my friends are in love with the ergo baby carrier. They claim it is 100 times better.

I really like the Eurobath, it is good till toddler age.

You need to get sheet savers, 2

Crib mattress pad, 2

At least 4 crib sheets (in case your kids spits up a lot.)

Changing table pad covers, about 3

You need a mobile from about 4 weeks on they can see them. Fisher price and tiny love make good ones.

Fisher price makes great crib toys, the baby can use it from sitting up-any age.

A gym play mat

sleep gowns are great for infant sleeping

packs of onesies

packs of socks--trumpet are so cute

a cool mist humidifier

ear and butt thermometer

diaper cream, I like A&D with and without zinc

nasal aspirator

nail clippers and baby file

medicine dropper and syringe

breast feeding cover

brush and comb

lotion-I love california baby items

baby soap

mylacon

gripe water

infant tylenal

saline nose drops

medela-pump in style, advanced double electric breast pump

hands free pump bra (at 1800 diapers or online)

lansinoh cream

avent breast pads

breast milk storage bags

crib wedge

sleep sac, you use this instead of a blanket

I didn't use Dreft, I used tide all the time but I do love the smell of method squeeky green baby detergent, now I use that.

I never used a bottle brush. I put everything in the dishwasher.

I really like pampers because the stretch. But huggies overnight diapers when they fit into a size 3.

Huggies wipes, I like the smell and texture

Toddler Potty

2010-07-06T18:46:00.000-07:00

I found the best toilet seat ever. I had tried so many for my son and we got pee everywhere. The seats would fall apart after some time, never clean correctly and guests would break them by not noticing that they were there.

The last straw was my 3 year old son, closing the toilet lid and pressing down so hard that the real seat broke off because it does not close over the potty seat.

The seat is called the family seat, from one step ahead. It is awesome! The little seat folds into the big seat. It fits properly on the toilet, so no more pee on the floor!!!!!!!

Your Baby At Week 3, Reflux & Colic

2010-07-06T18:18:00.000-07:00

No one had ever told me that your baby seems to wake up at week 3. My son must have been the perfect baby and I did not know it.

When my daughter was 3 weeks old she was out of control. At this point I was too tired to read any of the books on the market and needed information fast. I was sorry I did not take the time before the baby came out to read all the books in Barns and Knoble but who ever has all of that time. I skimmed what I could at this point.

From process of elimination over many weeks we found out that she had both reflux and colic. Lucky Me!!! My pediatrician told me that these two things can begin as early as week three in a babies life.

This is what I learned:

-They have many of the same symptoms

-Reflux happens often and does not mean that your child is spitting up.

They can even just arch their back and make their body stiff and straight.

It does seem to bother them most at night but does affect the baby all day as well.

The baby often keeps trying to eat, they think this makes them feel better.

Also, all babies spit up! A reflux spit up smells like throw up. The baby is usually not a happy spitter.

Sleeping in a swing helps or just upright!

*If you have to put your child on meds for reflux, they are such a big help. If you do prevacid, get the solutabs. They work the best! Give them to the baby when he/she is flat on their back in a syringe. Shake the syringe and squirt a little, shake again and repeat. That is the best way to give the meds and they really do work 100% better then the liquid, the liquid separates and becomes not as effective.

-Colic happens at the same time every day!

Usually in the evening.

Almost nothing that you do will make it better.

You may will feel like you want to throw the baby out the window (this is normal BUT DO NOT DO THAT), so get help from everyone who offers and ask those that don't realize they need to offer.

Your partner should be involved 150%.

If you can afford a baby nurse, that is a big help.

Accept help from all family members and friends that offer.

You will try gripe water, mylicon, getting gas out, feeding, shushing....etc...

Nothing really helps 100% All methods help a little.

*If anyone out there really has a colic baby, let me know. I will give you a bullet point list of ideas to go through each night.

Waking At Night After 18mons

2010-06-29T17:10:00.000-07:00

Waking at night happens with children. It happens with adults. Most big people can turn over and fall back to sleep, when we do this often we check the clock. A little person has no idea what time it is, that cannot judge, "Should I go back to sleep?"or "Should I get up and play?"

I first found the teach me time clock. When my son was 17 months he was waking at 3am and trying to play. I had no idea how to teach him that it was still night beside telling him it was night and showing him that it was dark out. A friend told me about this clock. I was not sure it would work because he was so young. I bought it anyway because I was desperate. I spent about a week pointing out every yellow and green thing that I could find to my son, until he knew these colors and began pointing them out to me. Then, I began telling him that green means, "Go!" or "Wake Up!" and yellow means, "Slow Down!" and "Go Back To Sleep!"

At this point I put the clock in my sons bedroom. When he woke at night and I went in, I would first ask him what color his clock was. And he would always tell me yellow. Then I asked what does yellow mean? He would tell me go slow and go back to sleep. Then I would say, you need to go back to sleep until your clock turns green and it means "Go Play!"

I soon had my son sleeping at night and not waking me until his clock turned green.

*REMEMBER BE REASONABLE ABOUT THE TIME YOU SET, ACCORDING TO YOUR WHEN YOUR CHILD SHOULD WAKE, NOT WHEN YOU WANT THEM TO WAKE!

After a year or so, my son began waking around 6:30am and was very capable of playing safely in his room for a little while. That's when I found the Good Nite Lite. This nite lite changes from a sun to a moon at the times you set it to. I currently have the nite lite changing from a moon to a sun at 6am, and if the sun is up on his nite lite he can play in his room. But he cannot come out of his room until the clock turns green. This is a little much, I realize. But my son is a very busy boy and he is quite smart. He has no problems following this system and I can always stay in bed until 7am. Very exciting!!!!

New Mom Groups

2010-06-28T18:20:00.000-07:00

It is so important to join a, "New Moms Group." I gave two suggested groups in links on the right hand side of this page. One is called Baby Bites and the other is Big City Moms. These groups are located in NYC, but every city and town have their own version. These groups saved my life and taught me everything that I needed to know about being a mom. I made my best friends by going to their lunch meeting sleep deprived. If I did nothing else in the first few months of my son's life, I got to at least one meeting a week. I lived for Tuesday afternoons at 1!

Your old friends are always going to be around. However it is very important to make friends with other moms who have children the same age as your new little one. It helps you keep your sanity to be able to talk to other moms going through the same things at the same times. For example, if your child recently had trouble pooping or just began applesauce, you will be very excited to talk about this. People that don't have children that age may listen to you for a minute, but will not want to listen to you for an hour. Another mom who has a baby that age will be more the happy to listen to you rant and rave about the new little things that your baby may or may not be doing.

You can never have too many friends!!!!

Gas

2010-06-28T07:57:00.000-07:00

I was so surprised to learn how many first time parents do not know about gas and their infants.

Certain foods you eat when you breastfeed can make your baby have gas, as well as some formulas. But like adults, different things make different babies have gas. None of the typically gassy foods made either one of my children have a problem. It was always some typically non gassy food.

When you breast feed and your child has a gassy day, try and think about what you ate in the last 24 hours. Write it down and hang on to it. When your child has another gassy day, pull out that list of food and see if anything matches up. If not try the process again!

If you are formula feeding, you may need to change formulas if your child has several gassy days. But you should talk to your pediatrician about this.

When your child has gas, what do you do? How do you know they have gas? Usually children that are very young will cry when they have gas. They will make their body stiff. They may arch their back. They may put their feet up in the air. If you are not sure and your child is crying: lay them on your lap and crunch their legs up and down as if they were doing a reverse crunch, or move their legs like bicycle kicks, last (this works for burps and toots) lay the baby across your legs on their belly-then tap on their back like you are playing a drum! This presses their belly a bit for a toot and their back for a burp. Sometimes you have to try all three methods. Giving a baby Mylicon also helps with gas but will not work it out instantly like these methods. You may want to try everything if your baby is having a tough moment.

Welcome

2010-06-23T19:29:00.000-07:00

Hi Everyone Out There.

I am a mom with a son and daughter. I love being a mom!

When I first became a mom I learned that my mom knew a lot more then I ever thought and that I had a lot to learn.

I also learned that my strong background with children had taught me a great deal more about child rearing then I ever thought. Many friends would ask me for advice and quite often I knew the answers.

When I had my second child, I realized that I needed to share what a knew with other new moms. I could not believe the basic things that other moms had no clue about.

Also, I could not believe how many first time moms were in the dark about what to expect after the baby come out. For example: with their body, or how to get simple gas out of their baby!

I was so lucky my mom was brutally honest with me. I am a planner. If I had not been aware of these things, I would have went into a depression!

I can't wait to get started...